A prayerful wife

By Leigh Ann Dutton

Leigh Ann and Mark

Once the dust had settled on our wedding celebration and the honeymoon bill was paid, it was a plunge into reality like an ice cold bath on a wintry evening – shocking. The reality of marriage hit Mark and I like a two by four. Sure, we loved each other, and we were so excited that we were on the road to spending the rest of our lives together. Unfortunately, Mark’s job would have him traveling within weeks of our union. He would be home two maybe three days a week, and the days he was home, he was working on finishing his master’s degree. Our honeymoon days ended quickly.

The first eight months of our marriage was the most difficult of all of our married days. We fought like cats and dogs. There were many nights of Mark standing in front of the door begging me to not go through it. We hated being apart, but we couldn’t stand being together. It was ugly – very ugly.

By God’s grace, and through the help of faithful friends, God saved our marriage. A friend said to me, “Leigh Ann, all the things you are saying to Mark is right, and he needs to hear what you have to say. But friend, your tone sucks (his words, not mine…). You might consider talking to God before going to Mark.

I never forgot those words. Since those early days of marriage, I have learned there is truly no greater gift we can give to our husbands than lifting him up in prayer daily. There is power in a marriage covered in prayer – God’s power.

In the midst of our busy lives, it is easy to allow too much time to pass before we take a moment to pray for our husbands. However, friends, we mustn’t let this happen. We must be committed to prayer. We must be committed to taking our worries, concerns, and even attitudes to the foot of the cross before we ever take them to our husbands.

Praying for our marriages helps to ensure that we are fulfilling God’s purpose for our marriage by keeping us joined together in unity. Therefore, prayer is one of the greatest privileges we have as believers to keep our marriages strong and flourishing for the glory of God.

But how can we faithfully pray for our husbands? There are three things I do to ensure that I am building into my marriage the habit of prayer.

1. Ask

I ask Mark often how I can be praying for him. He always feels loved when I ask him how I can be interceding for him. It’s like that extra dose of confidence he needs to tackle his day head on.

Some women choose a particular task they do daily and use that time to pray for their husbands. For example, I have a friend who prays for her husband every time she does the dishes. You could pray for your husband every time you put on make-up, dry your hair, sort the laundry, or stop at a red light. These are all great ideas for reminding you to pray for your husband daily.

2. Plan

In addition to the needs Mark is aware of, I try to pray specific character qualities daily. It is so easy to pray, “Lord bless my husband,” and be done. Yet, we should be specific in our prayers. For example, praying for our husband’s integrity, compassion, purity, and spiritual growth (just to name a few) is essential to the well-being of our marriage.

3. Help

If you truly want to grow in praying for your marriage, ask for help. Ask other women in your small group, your sisters, mother, etc. to hold you accountable to praying daily for your spouse. Having someone checking in with me to see if I’m being a faithful prayer warrior for my spouse has been so incredibly helpful to seal the habit of prayer into my marriage.

Recently, I invited my readers at IntentionalByGrace.com to join me in praying daily for our spouses. I created a Facebook group, as well as invited those who do not have Facebook to join us via email. Right now, we have more than 80 men and women signed up! That’s 80 marriages kneeling at the foot of the cross daily! To God be the glory. You’re welcome to join in if you would like. Visit my site to learn more.

Prayer. It is the one habit that your marriage cannot do without. It is the one habit that will make all the difference. Will you join me in praying for your spouse daily?


photo taken by Erin Manfredi – http://www.erinmanfredi.com.

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