It’s Not About FootballBy Trillia Newbell | August 17th, 2012 | Category: Uncategorized | 1 Comment »
By Trillia Newbell
It’s football time in Tennessee! Fans are gearing up for tailgate parties, Saturday morning car jams, and noise, lots of noise. I love football season. But to the dismay of my husband I don’t love it because it’s football season. I love it because the leaves will change. I love it because of the smell of cookouts and coal burning. I love the Fall because we are getting closer to Christmas.
But when it comes to football, I’m kind of like the Grinch or maybe the Grim Reaper. If it’s on in our home I find any excuse not to sit and watch it. I just don’t care to see a bunch of men running towards each other and throwing balls. (To all my brothers out there playing football, I wish you a wonderful season. 🙂 I just may not be watching.)
But, my husband enjoys it. Over the past nine years I’ve avoided it like the plague (unless we go to a game, then all of a sudden I’m interested). Each year I try to like football and each year I fail miserably. I feel like it’s some silly wifely duty for me to like football. I’ve even felt guilty in the past for not liking football.
Even today I posted a message to a friend that I was going to try to be “into” football this year.
Then it dawned on me. I’ve got it all wrong. It’s not at all about football. It’s about Thern (my husband). It’s about being his lover and his friend. I don’t need to try to enjoy football. I should enjoy Thern, which I do.
Tim and Kathy Keller address the idea of friendship in marriage in their book The Meaning of Marriage.
“Friendship love can be cultivated by spending quality time together. That means doing something that at least one of you loves doing and that enables you to communicate while doing it. Most people immediately think of recreation and entertainment, and that is right, but doing common work tasks—like gardening or chores—bonds you together, too. Above all, show your spouse that time with him or her has priority in your life.” (p. 159)
That is simple and basic. My husband is my friend.
This also means I don’t have to like football! Whew. That’s a relief. But I do love my husband and as his friend I can enjoy a game with him. Perhaps with this new mindset I might even begin to like football. Nah, probably not, but I do anticipate cuddling up under him to watch, holding his hand, and enjoying snacks together. I anticipate chatting about the game (really just him telling me what is going on) and laughing at his excitement.
Yes! It’s football time in Tennessee!