The Womanhood Chatter and Going Beyond Wars

By Trillia Newbellkid drawing proverbs

The Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood recently announced new branding and initiatives and that I would be the Editor of the new Women’s Channel. I am incredibly excited about this new role. I think about it and what we might be able to accomplish every day.  After the announcement I emailed a friend and jokingly wrote, “Well, that solidifies that. I am officially a complementarian.”

For many of my friends complementarian doesn’t have any meaning at all. They interpret various Scriptures in such a way that clearly defines them as complementarians but if you asked, what does that word mean they’d most likely say, “I don’t know.”  The purpose of this post isn’t to define complementarianism. As the CBMW blog rolls out I will be linking up to our stuff over there which will provide wonderful resources as well as encouraging articles, devotionals and much more. Until then you can visit the CBMW Core Beliefs page or if you have 5 minutes I’d suggest listening to Pastor John Piper’s recent podcast about biblical womanhood.

So I would say that I am unashamedly complementarian in biblical interpretation for the roles and value of men and women in the home and church.

But I also must confess; I want to be liked. I have wonderful friends who are egalitarian (another word that to most people means absolutely nothing. I would suggest looking at Adrian Warnock’s various definitions to get a full picture of what I am talking about).  I have had intelligent and encouraging conversations with these girlfriends about my new role and how the Lord might use it for all of our good. I’m thankful for ladies like Jenny Rae Armstrong (blogger and fellow Red Bud Writer). We completely disagree on many points including biblical interpretation, but we love each other.

As I step out and write more about these topics, I find myself feeling like I’m swimming upstream while everyone is heading the opposite direction. There have been many hurts and abuse in the church that I have not experienced. Women are fighting against this everywhere. And I have a husband who is kind, gentle and a leader in the home. I realize that I am potentially an anomaly.  So as I watch the culture and my friends, I can feel like a fish out of water and maybe even a little radical (yes, I used that word in reference to being what many would say is incredibly not radical). So there’s this temptation to fear man.

But this is also why I can hardly wait to get started at CBMW. I am convinced that God’s design is beautiful and when applied rightly magnifies Him, not us.

What I think I’m most excited about as I step further into the conversation on womanhood is God has abundant grace available for us to enter in without it being a war.  The topic is about to get new life and breath and I am convinced it will be good.  It doesn’t have to be a war. I truly love people and therefore my goal (I hope and pray) won’t be to win a fight but to encourage, build up, teach, and prayerfully bring light and grace into a volatile conversation with the help of incredibly strong and gracious contributors and the leadership and assistance of Courtney Reissig.

Women, I invite you to join me in being radically different. We can have intelligent and useful conversations, completely disagree (yep, we can disagree), maybe even teach each other something, without blog wars or culture wars or any war. I’m excited to enter this conversation with you (whoever you are) and believe with all my heart we can come out of this without wounds.

Perhaps we could even join together with Louie Giglio and End It!

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14 Comments to “The Womanhood Chatter and Going Beyond Wars”

  1. Christina says:

    I’m excited and can’t wait to see what God is going to do through this. Praying Hod would strengthen you in your new role.

  2. Aimee Byrd says:

    I’m excited too Trillia. I want to encourage you that the spirit that you are writing in is the exact friendliness that I have received in every interaction with you. You are so supportive, and I really appreciate the way that you are connecting women. I love how you are emphasizing the fact that disagreement is okay, and can be done in a godly, sharpening way. While we take the issue seriously, it can be a friendly conversation.

  3. Trillia Newbell says:

    Thank you Christina!

  4. Trillia Newbell says:

    This is very encouraging. Wow. God’s kindness. Thank you!

  5. Lisa Spence says:

    Ditto to everything Aimee said! I’m excited both about your new venture and the opportunity for women to discuss these issues with grace and respect.

  6. Trillia, you and your marriage are not an anomaly. It’s just that the voices of the healthy, good experiences aren’t getting enough good press! I’m one of those for whom these labels have little or no meaning in both doctrine and practice. But I applaud the notion that we can disagree on these and other matters in love, and we can sharpen one another. I’m so proud to have you as a friend and fellow Redbud.

  7. Trillia Newbell says:

    Karen! You are so dear to me. Thank you for these words. We need to give good healthy marriages some more press! Thankful to know you and count you as a friend!

  8. Trillia Newbell says:

    Thank you, Lisa!

  9. Congrats on your new position. I love the CBMW and use their site as a great research resource. Thank you for holding fast to this position while showing us that we can still having loving friendships with those who hold differently. Very often, we view each other and treat each other as enemies. Blog post comments are one place we see this reality come to life. Thank you for living in the Light while standing firm!

  10. Trillia Newbell says:

    Thank you, Melissa! Very encouraging!

  11. I respect that you are following a teaching you believe is correct. But also consider that God’s ways do not rely on the goodness of men (or women) to bring life. Complimentarianism, on the other hand, is wholey dependant on the goodness of men and women to work. As wonderful as it is theoretically, it’s no accident that in reality it enables enormous abuse and suffering for so many people. Jesus said you will know a thing by its fruit. The fruit of complimentarianism is so often bad precisely because it depends on the goodness of men rather than the perfection of God. That’s pretty air-tight evidence that it’s not actually from God, imo. I hope that you blessed in your work and are able to help people who are trapped in this system of thought. But even more I pray for the day when it falls altogether and all of God’s people can find the perfect freedom from the ways of men which Jesus died for us to have.

  12. Trillia Newbell says:

    Thanks so much for sharing. I’d have to disagree with you. We are all clinging to the same Cross and no one lives perfectly righteous. The gospel frees us to pursue His Word and to pursue Him. We won’t do this perfectly, but I do believe He can give us grace. Thanks again.

  13. Alicia Joy says:

    I am definitely looking forward to the growth, encouragement, and even unity that will come from this. Stay true to those convictions 🙂 I am encouraged already by your honesty in seeing the potential challenges that will come. I will be praying that you continue to feel that freedom that comes from working towards things that will last eternally 🙂

  14. Trillia Newbell says:

    Amen, Alicia! I think this will be fun to watch God work! Thanks for the encouragement.